Heavy Hearts

Today, I am tired.

Tired in an exhausted from working so hard kind of way,

but also tired in a heavy heart kind of way.

So many bad things have happened in the news this week.

The Boston Marathon Explosion weighs heavy on my heart because I use to run.

I never called myself a runner, although I ran several 5K's.

I'm not sure I ever got to the point where I could run the entire 3.1 miles without walking or taking a break to catch my breath.

Running was something I really enjoyed!

I will run again.

Things just need to settle down a bit in my life.

I loved the feeling of crossing the finish line and looking at the time as I crossed.

I am not a fast finisher!

The important thing was that I finished.

I can't begin to imagine how those runners felt on Monday when they couldn't cross that finish line.

Or, when they arrived at the last leg of the race to find the aftermath of the explosions.

How can one or two people ruin the glory of so many? 

Another thing weighing heavy on my heart is the West, Texas Fertilizer Plant Explosion.

Several things hit home.

One being, West, Texas is a small town.

The citizens of that town rely on the fertilizer plant as their source of income.

We live in a small town.

Our small town has done so much for us during our loss.

Our town, too, has a manufacturing plant that the town relies on to remain on the map.

Two being, the explosion was the same type of fertilizer that was used in the Oklahoma City Bombing.

The Oklahoma City Bombing's 18th anniversary is tomorrow, April 19, 2013.

I remember April 19, 1995 like it was yesterday.

I was pregnant with Drewman.

I was setting at my desk.

My office was located in a glass octagon building, on the second floor.

My office chair shook and the glass of the building rattled.

A few moments later, my heart sank as I heard the news on the radio.

Later that week, Timothy McVeigh was being held in our local courthouse as the key suspect of the bombing!

Sunday, April 28th will be The 13th Annual Oklahoma City Memorial Marathon.

For me, this is where this story ties together. 

A few years ago, 4 girl friends and I ran the relay portion of the Oklahoma City Memorial Marathon.

It was one of the most moving races I ran.

It wasn't personal.

It was being a part of a group to memorialize the victims.

Tomorrow at 9:02am, I will have a heavy heart as I did 18 years ago setting in my office chair.

The morning of the 28th, at sunrise, I will have a heavy heart for all those runners.

I know they will have fear as they run to memorialize the victims of such tragic events.

Some will run for the OKC victims.

Some will run for the Boston victims.

Some will run for the West, Texas victims.

Some will run for victims of cancer, defects and other diseases.

Some will just run.
ALL will have fear and heavy hearts.